We all know that feeling. The feeling when someone casually says something that causes us discomfort, embarrassment, or shame. All we see is the taillights of the bus we were just thrown under. Many people seem to do this as a reflex. They seem to be thinking, “People are looking for someone to blame. I’ll deflect it to Mary Joe Bobby Sue*.”
That isn’t the only time people get tossed under the bus. Several of my seminary friends, who shall remain nameless cough Kevin cough Will cough cough**, and I would throw each other under the bus on occasion. Sometimes for amusement and other times to test out new ideas, “Professor, we were talking and Tom was thinking (insert strange thought here.)” I can almost hear the rumbling of the bus.
Unfortunately most of the time when people throw others under the bus it causes harm. Often it is bearing false witness. We throw them under to deflect attention away from ourselves and what we’ve done wrong. This is sinful behavior not simply because bearing false witness is wrong but because it hurts relationships. It hurts the relationship of the one tossed under the bus and the one who tossed. It also causes problems between the one who got tossed under and the others involved. They may think the tossing is true. This runs afoul of Jesus’ command to love one another.
When we talk about witnessing to God many don’t realize that people are watching us. When we announce or share that we are Christian, people begin to watch how we behave to see if Christianity is something worth their while. When we provide a bad witness through our behavior we may actually be leading people away from Christ. So what are we to do?
On the side of every school bus is a stop sign with flashing lights. We need to pay attention to the stop signals. We need to recognize when we are about to throw somebody under the bus and STOP!!!!! Heed the warning signs, fight the urge, and don’t do it. This may be harder than it appears at first glance. This may involve us taking responsibility for our behaviors including whatever we did that we are deflecting by throwing someone under the bus. Also, I don’t think we can simply cease a negative behavior because that creates a vacuum that has to be filled in. So as we concentrate on not throwing people under the bus let us continue to toss. Confusing right?
What would happen if we heeded the stop sign for the negative behavior and changed it to a positive? For example: Who decided to do that children’s video last Sunday? I did but didn’t Sarah and Jill*** do an awesome job! They really work hard to ensure that the children are included and are getting to know and understand Jesus.
So if we cannot stop throwing people under the bus let us at east make it for positives!
This is this pastor’s opinion.
*This is an imaginary name it could have just as easily be John Thomas William Wayne.
** Did you see what I did there? Throwing Kevin and Will under the bus…
***Sarah and Jill do an incredible amount of work for Westview UMC especially the children. They are awesome!